Rice University has once again come to a unanimous dissenting opinion concerning Martel’s petition to be considered an actual college. For the twelfth straight year, Martel has been denied inclusion into the residential college system.
Martel freshman remain confused as to why they’re even there. “I mean, if I’m paying the same tuition as everyone else, why am I stuck in this blue and maroon sham?”
Martel is likely to appeal the decision, but if history indicates anything, its pleas will continue to be unheard.
“We are not pleased with the decision,” explained Martel College president Isabel Brown . “We will continue the noble fight.”
Written in collaboration with Michael Saucedo and Michael Portal